Month: April 2013

  • Jesus the Healer and Life in Laying Down Self

    When we are wounded, Jesus is our healer, and for deep and severe wounds, he is sometimes like our hospital. And the point of the hospital is to be healed to the point of getting out there and loving well again. We don’t have a mean coach, sending us out into the game to get wounded again. We have a loving father, who knows that He created us to be in relationship. Not only do we find life in the context of relating to each other, but we especially find it in that part of relating that requires us to lay down self and to give something more. It’s more than simply regaining life. We actually soar to new heights of living in working past the challenges and pressing on through the pain.

    And so as difficult as it is sometimes, as much pain as it causes, Jesus calls us to actively love one another! He does not offer us himself as an alternative to actively loving the other 7 billion people on the planet. He does not offer himself as an excuse from actively loving the hundreds that we are personally acquainted with. He does not offer us a platform for holding on to arrogance, judgment, grudges, resentments, wounds, or the role of a victim. Instead he offers himself as the answer to the question “Where is the justice? Who will pay for all this? How does this work out well in the end?” Unlike the world we chose to create for ourselves, in choosing to claim for ourselves the knowledge of good and evil (and yet in our fallibility, requiring many judges), in the world He created, only one point of justice is required, for there is only one judge, and his judgment is perfect.

  • Soul ties and emotional dependency

    A soul tie is a spiritual connection between two people. It can be healthy or unhealthy. It can come about through a vow, through sex, or simply through close relationship.

    In a healthy soul tie or a healthy emotional connection, God comes first for both people. God is more important to me than the person I am in relationship with, and He is more important to them than I am. As a result the healthy soul tie or emotional connection is a source of blessing and encouragement. Each person finds completeness and contentment in their relationship with God, and freely shares out of that abundance with the other.

    An unhealthy soul tie or emotional dependency is a form of idolatry and addiction. The relationship with the other person or the desire to be with them has taken a place of authority that should only be God’s. Some symptoms of this are when the relationship is a source of emptiness, abuse,pain, and unfulfilled longing.

    A person with many unhealthy soul ties is a minefield of emotional complexity, but the really sad part is that the real person often stands paralyzed, buried underneath a web of conflicting emotional strings that pull them in different directions while others block their way.

    Because of His great love for us, God wants to be number one in every heart. He knows He is the only one who can hold that place of authority without abusing it, the only one who can free every true self to truly come out and live. And so while He is patient, and waits to be invited,He is eager to free us from soul ties and emotional dependencies. He is eager to take the number one place in our hearts and begin settings all things right.

    Breaking a soul tie or emotional dependency is a cooperative effort including the person with the soul tie, the person interviewing and praying for them, and God. The Holy Spirit leads the process, but here are somethings that often need to happen in case of a soul tie or emotional dependency:

    1. The person with the soul tie or dependency should:
      1. Repent of any sin such as extramarital sex that contributed to the soul tie
      2. Get rid of any objects that remind them of the soul tie, such as gifts
      3. Renounce any vows that led to or were part of the soul tie or emotional dependency, especially vows that gave someone else authority that should be God’s
      4. Forgive the other person! Unforgiveness is a powerful bondage.
      5. Renounce the soul tie, out loud, naming the person.
    2. The person praying for them should break the soul tie in Jesus name
    3. Both people should invite the Holy Spirit to flow in to that place, establishing it as God’s own forever.