July 10, 2008

  • How I miss my Home

    (This is a post about God's call to his children stuck in addiction to relational, sexual and other kinds of idolatry).

     

    Oh, how I miss my home! How I miss the way you used to sing to me. Your voice was so beautiful – the way it resonated in the wide open spaces of your wide open heart. Your songs of love were a sweet sound to my ear.  And there I was – do you remember? There I was, living in you, reigning over your heart, a kingdom of love. A kingdom for everyone! Everyone in your life stared in wonder and disbelief at the beautiful love in your eyes, the way you looked at them, and your voice, the way you spoke to them.

     

    No one was excluded. Everyone was loved, with a childlike, trusting love. Even those who were mean to you found a soft padding to slam against until they were exhausted from their aggression, got away to be alone, and sat down in their quiet places to reflect on your gentle responses. How many I spoke to in those places! How open their minds were in those moments to finally hear my call on their life!

     

    But now you have forgotten me for another love. What is this thing? What is it? What does it do for you, really? It is a fraud. Wake up, my love, wake up! In the drunken stupor of your idolatry you have become like a drunkard eating maggot infested meat. In your feeding frenzy you say to yourself, “YES! Now THIS is is meat!” and in unspoken places you silently despise me for the discipline I was building in you.

     

    I know what has happened. An enemy has fooled you. He asked you, over and over, “what’s in it for you?” Persistent in his lies, he has showed you the beauty of my creations in the distorting light of his fraudulent promises of satisfaction. You resisted, but now he has drawn you away.

     

    Do you think yourself more open minded now? See how your mind has closed! For now everyone is judged -- by whether my enemy says they will help meet your need, or not. You are so attuned to his lies -- he has closed your ears and mind to the truth and love that I send to you, and has you prowling about like a predator, looking only to meet your own needs by feeding on the cesspools of fantasy.

     

    Wake up! The communion bread turns to maggots as your worship turns from me to the created.  The person you see is not the person who really is. The relationship you experience is a fantasy -- all the words and actions are but scripts in a play, mindlessly uttered yet craftfully written as traps that lead to your destruction.

     

    Wake up! See and feel the squirming, life destroying maggots you are filling yourself with. Spew out the ones in your mouth and call out to me in despair! I will kill them with a word and you will be clean. The enemy will still pull on you but, eyes open, you will follow me back to freedom.

     

    I wrote most of this the morning we were moving to Baytown. There I was, rushing about trying to get a bunch of last minute things put together -- and taken apart -- for the movers to put on the truck, when all the sudden this whole thing just grabbed me like stray electricity. I dropped what I was doing and went into the office, and the moment I began to type it just streamed onto the screen. After a few minutes I felt the pressure fall off , and recognized that I could finish it off later. That just happened tonight so I'm posting it. I hope it reaches anyone who needs a call back to freedom.